Our article today will attempt to encourage those of us that have had an unfair disadvantage in life that there is some light at the end of the tunnel.

We all come from different backgrounds and some of us have not had it easy.

We may have had difficult upbringing.

We should not be quick to judge when we see people who may behave in a certain way from what is expected, or have different views, it may be because of some underlying issues.

Dysfunctional family

There are different types of families, ranging from a nuclear family (traditional type), single parent family, step family, extended family, and so on.

According to Wikipedia a dysfunctional family is:

‘a family in which conflict, misbehaviour, and often child neglect or abuse on the part of individual parents occur continuously and regularly, leading other members  to accommodate such actions’.

There are those that have experienced different forms of abuse in family settings. Perhaps a result of being raised by parents with addiction.

Being subjected to various forms of physical, emotional abuse and torment from guardians and parents leave some scars.

A challenging environment like:

  • Growing up with no immediate role model in the family for inspiration.
  • Hard life.
  • suffering abuse and neglect.
  • Tough parents.
  • brothers/ family members who are criminals.
  • Toxic family with no hope whatsoever.

Maybe you have been in and out of prison for petty crime, theft and graduated to serious violent crime.

For most people that are brought up in dysfunctional families, that is the normal thing they know.

Its only when one moves away, witnessing and experiencing a different life style that they then question their understanding.

This may lead to positive or negative change.

Effects

When realising that what you considered as normal is not affects people in different ways.

Maybe you have grown up with deep unexplained anger that’s a result of growing up in a dysfunctional family.

  • Deep anger.
  • Concealing your feelings of hurt and problems.
  • Hating your life.
  • Guilt.
  • low self esteem.
  • Self hatred.
  • Feelings of being unworthy.
  • Substance abuse perhaps.
  • mental issues.

Maybe you made a mistake and you are paying a heavy price for it.

We all make mistakes. Life is full of mistakes but we learn from them and choose a better path for us.

  • Don’t graduate into a serious criminal or worse.
  • You don’t have to be in and out of prison.

There is hope.

Your life can change for the better.

What you are going through could be illness maybe depression. When you just seem so sad and there is no reason for it.

What you need is help and friends.

Support to stand on your feet and be happy again.

There is more to this life.

The world is waiting for someone like you.

There may be somebody out there and they dont want to make the same mistake as you did, they want to hear from you.

You can be that lifeline.

Live your life fully.

God loves you. Ask and tell him how you are feeling. You have nothing to lose.

Claim your life back

As it is we experience unfairness and inequalities in life.

It’s not just about having a disadvantage in your upbringing that can hold you back, but there are many things that can hold us back like race/ colour, name, geography, disability and so on.

Let’s stop discrediting ourselves.

Give yourself a break and use those good qualities you have to turn things around.

  • Learn to love yourself again.
  • Put yourself first.
  • Be good to yourself.
  • Look after your body and mind.
  • Forgive.
  • Get therapy/ counselling
  • Talk

Whatever you need in life believe that:

  • You are the best actor/actress for that part you are eying.
  • writer.
  • artist.
  • business person.
  • drummer.
  • whatever you want to accomplish in life.

Its only you that can break that cycle of misfortune in your life. You can pass on a good legacy to your children and children’s children: a legacy of love, peace and beauty.

Showing empathy

Hindsight is something wonderful. There are lots of people in society and in our communities needing our help. Lets develop eyes that can see instead of thinking about what could have been.

  • Tolerance
  • Slow to judge.
  • empathy

If someone is going through a tough time be it something of their making or not we should develop some understanding.

There is a point in life when we all require someone’s else help.

References

Wikipedia.

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